From the Archives: First Impressions

Image by Terri Cnudde from Pixabay

From the Archives is a series where I revisit old posts and essays from my writing archives. I'm also cleaning up old files. Some posts are so outdated they are easily discarded. Some pieces still have relevance, while others are just fun to look back on. I'm hoping this turns out to be an entertaining series - a monthly segment here on the blog.

Here is one short post I wrote back in 2012 on a blog called Perfectly Pink. 

First Impressions

“Hair style is the final tip-off whether or not

a woman really knows herself.”

Hubert De Givenchy, Vogue (July 1985)

Spring is in the air. You’ve just had a new makeover and your face looks fab. Maybe you’ve added a couple pieces to your wardrobe. And now your hair style needs a serious update. Brenda Kinsel, author of several books including 40 over 40: 40 Things Every Woman Over 40 Needs to Know About Getting Dressed, (1999) shared this interesting hair tip:

“Go to a new hair designer looking your best self. Introduce yourself to the hairdresser fully clothed the first time, before they get you into a smock. Let the hairdresser see who you are. Here’s a place where first impressions will really help ensure that you get the cut that works with your lifestyle and taste.”

That was an aha moment for me (for I was all too familiar with leaving hair salons disappointed). Years earlier, not related to my hair, as a young woman I came to the city to find a job. It was the late 1970s, and I decided to use a temp agency, hoping this would get my foot in the door to a nice place in the downtown area. I didn’t think to dress up for this initial interview with the agency—after all it wasn’t a potential employer who'd be seeing me. But I soon began to wonder why the temp jobs I kept getting were never in those plushy downtown offices, but in more casual, industrial kind of places. It wasn’t until much later that it finally dawned on me: the agency's first impression of me was that I was a casual 'pants' kind of girl, and so the jobs they sent me to were to the more casual kind of sites. (After that, I did my best to look the part whenever I went for an interview. And things improved, I'm happy to report.)

It’s true, first impressions matter...at job interviews, and now we learn even at hair salons. If you haven’t been getting the style you want, maybe you’re giving them the wrong impression of who you are in ‘real’ life.

I never really thought about what I wore or how my hair looked when I arrived at a salon; after all, they were going to wash my hair, cut it, and style it all anyway. But if they only see me in a way that doesn't reflect my most authentic self, in my relaxed 'at home' stance rather than in my 'how I want to present myself to the world', no wonder a person can walk away disappointed.

That first impression turns out to be the unconscious standard people will refer to forever after. So it's something to keep in mind for all our first encounters... not just in hair salons.

Here’s to living your life more beautifully... more truly you everywhere you go!

❦

Wishing you a beautiful weekend,

Brenda

My Blogging Schedule:

I post on Fridays

Guest Blogging Elsewhere: The Writing Advice I Needed

Image by Ylanite Koppens from Pixabay

I have a new blog post up on InScribe, my writers' fellowship blog. This month we are chatting about the best writing advice we've ever received. You can find what I share by clicking on the link HERE.

I will be back here on Friday... 

 ❦

Wishing you a beautiful day,

Brenda

My Blogging Schedule:

I post on Fridays

Happy March: Five on Friday

Image by Christina Zetterberg from Pixabay

"Everything is brimming with possibility. Everything is pointing

forward to what is to come. And isn't that the way with

spring? It feels sweeter even than the highest summer day

because it arrives while winter still holds the earth."

ROB COWEN

from Spring Anthology (Melissa Harrison)

Image by Joanna from Pixabay

TODAY

One. Outside my window

We've had a mix of winter and spring over the last few weeks.

As I write this paragraph, it's snowy, cold, windy, and hazy.

A good day to hibernate indoors.

Oh...oh... the sun came out and warmed the air.

Rivulets begin to trickle down the street.

And suddenly it feels like maybe spring is really

on its way. A big sigh of relief.

Wait...wait...wait...

Oh dear, it's snowing again, now with

a force behind the shreds of cotton flakes.

It's March in Alberta.

Two. Rose Postcard Giveaway

My apologies. 

I made this announcement in my February 6th blog post

with names to be drawn on February 13th.

Then I totally forgot about it with other needful

things vying for my attention.

I went back to the comments section on that post and

on my FB page. Collected the names into the proverbial

hat. Pulled out two (as I said I would).

We have two winners!

A big congratulations to:

Tamara Willems

&

Sharon Goemaere

Three.  Inside my head

"Do you ever listen to a song and remember exactly

what life was like when you first heard it?"

Asked someone online.

Oh yes, indeed!

There I am, about six or seven years old, sitting on

the back step on a warm summer afternoon with my

little sister and older beloved cousin, our ears

attuned to Larry's little transistor radio as a new

band sings, "We all live in a yellow submarine,

a yellow submarine, a yellow submarine..."

We fell in love with the Beatles. And maybe

drove our mom crazy singing the song over and over.

Sweet and delightful memory of a time long ago.

 

Four. On my lap

These days, whenever I have a chance, I disappear into

the stories inside my books. It helps me escape from what's

going on in my own world, not to mention what's

happening in the world at large.

I recently read and enjoyed these novels:

The Mystery Guest by Nita Prose

(mystery, sequel to The Maid)

Molly the maid finds herself in the middle of

another murder at the posh hotel where she works.

The Bookbinder by Pip Williams

(during WWI)

A young woman, who has worked in the bookbindery

in Oxford since she was 14, longs to go to the Ladies

College across the street. 

Goodnight from London by Jennifer Robson

(WWII novel)

A young female journalist crosses the Atlantic Ocean from

America to the UK near the beginning of WWII to write

for two magazines about the war from London. Happily

there is a bit of romance tangled in the threads.

84, Charing Cross Road by Helen Hanff

(biography in letters)

A favourite book that I love to read on occasion. It's the

correspondence between a woman living in NYC

with a bookstore employee on 84 Charing Cross Road.

Having watched the movie numerous times, I love reading

the book - I hear and see the actors in my head.

A lovely book in which to escape.

The Limestone Manor by Jonny Thompson

(cozy mystery by Canadian author)

I wasn't familiar with this author, but his work started showing

up on my FB feeds. His 2-3 books have good reviews.

He writes a great little story about a group of seniors living

in St. Mary's, Ontario, who find themselves suddenly aware of

something nasty about to happen in their small town.

The characters are eccentric. I was delighted by the story. 

Not so much of a nailbiter that you can't relax

and let them solve the mystery.

I'm currently immersed in Hilary Mantel's

award-winning Wolf Hall. Set in the early 1500s

during Henry VIII's era. He sure is eager to get rid of

his wife Katherine and marry Anne Boleyn.

Don't do it, Anne!

     

Five. A wedding

My beautiful niece is getting married this summer.

We are excited. Ever since I got married years ago,

I always had a dream that one day I would pass along to

one of my nieces my beautiful pair of handmade earrings

(made by a dear friend especially for my wedding).

❦

On that note, I'm wishing you a beautiful day,

Brenda

My Blogging Schedule:

I post on Fridays

Five on Friday: Small Moments

"Celebrate small victories."

UNKNOWN

Life has turned busy and suddenly it's Friday. But I wanted to share some small moments that have brought cheer and delight this week to my heart. I hope you will enjoy my tiny offerings today.

One. Clementines

 

We've been eating clementines imported all the way from Spain.

What a delicious treat. We savour every thick-skinned, juicy fruit—

enjoying the scent of citrus zest on our fingers as we peel them.

Two. At the deli counter

I stopped the other day at the deli counter to pick up

some flatbread pizzas and sandwiches. An older fellow

was also scouting the display, probably for his own lunch.

We caught eyes. I spied what I wanted and reached around

to the back of the cooler, conspiratorially saying to him, "I

always take from the back as they are the freshest."

He nodded.

It was almost as if he'd tapped his finger on the side

of his nose - with that congenial secret understanding.

It left a warm feeling of connection.

Three. A tiny pile of new books

Three new books arrived at my house this week.

Their titles and descriptions look so inviting

(I have not read them yet):

 Seaview House

by Elizabeth Fair (novel, 1955)

(described as a comedy of domestic life)

A friend has read this author and really enjoyed her books.

Your Second Life Begins When You

Realize You Only Have One Life

by Raphaëlle Giordano (novel, 2018)

(one woman's quest to cure her "routinitis")

I thought I could use that kind of cure 😉. 

Peril at End House

by Agatha Christie (1932)

(Poirot mystery)

One can never go wrong with a Christie mystery.

Four. Twinkle lights

I never got around to adding twinkle lights around my

bookcase over the Christmas season—life was too busy then.

But I saw twinkle lights at Michaels the other day and

thought it's never too late to cheer up a dark corner.

Spring is still a long way off.

Five. From a novel I'm reading

"May God make safety your companion."

The English Patient

by Michael Ondaatje

Madox is bidding farewell to his colleague as they

part company after years of working together in the

Libyan Desert in North Africa. It's at the start of

World War II and everything is changing.

That's all for today. Please note I will be away for the next couple of Fridays. We are fine but we're tending to needful things in our circle of loved ones. Tomorrow is Valentine's Day. I hope you will feel the love and will have a taste of something sweet to celebrate.

❦

Heart hugs and wishes for a beautiful day,

Brenda

Photo credits:

(Top)Image by No_Name13 from Pixabay

(Twinkle lights)Brenda Leyland @ It's A Beautiful Life

My Blogging Schedule:

I post on Fridays 

Five on Friday: And here it's February

" I urge you to please notice when you are happy,

and exclaim or murmur or think at some point,

'If this isn't nice, I don't know what is.' "

KURT VONNEGUT

I could feel myself smiling when I caught sight of tulips at the grocery store the other day. There is nothing like a bunch of pretty tulips to lift the spirits and add a cheery brightness to our world. With the winter holidays in the distant past and my days of hibernating in January also history, thoughts of Valentine's Day and spring begin to bubble up. The days are growing lighter. Cheery rivulets form as snow and ice melt on these spring-like days. If winter weather returns, and it probably will, it feels like we're ahead of the game at this stage.

I'm starting to feel like writing again. So I hope you enjoy today's edition of Five on Friday. Thank you for stopping by.

 

One. "Rose Postcards" giveaway

Sometimes when you're just browsing, that's when you find the best things. A box of postcards sat on its edge, like a book, on the shelf in the gardening section of our local bookstore. My hand reached out immediately. Inside were one hundred rose-themed postcards from the archives of The New York Botanical Garden. I was enthralled. What fun it will be to send these out in the mail. I think I'll even have a tiny giveaway and give some away here on the blog. Share the wealth, spread the joy.

In fact, if you leave a comment either here on my blog, or on my social media - Facebook or Instagram, mention "Rose Postcards", I'll put your name in the draw which we will do next week on Friday, February 13th. Two lucky winners for 5 postcards each.

Two. Things that cheer me up

- coffee brewing in the morning

- putting on the kettle

- a cup of tea in the afternoon

- hot buttered toast

- a pot of scented hyacinth in bloom

- a square of dark chocolate after supper

- the sound of trickling ice melting in early spring

- knowing a good book awaits at the end of the day

- putting things in order

- fresh sheets on the bed

- browsing a nice magazine

-going for a drive on a sunny afternoon

Three. Inner thoughts

How does one carry on without saying anything in response to the deeply unsettling events happening in the world around us? Some of it is just too close for comfort. And although it's often on my mind, and likely yours too, I want to assure you that I won't be sharing my opinions or thoughts about anything even remotely political here on my blog.

Some years ago, after much soul searching, I came to recognize that, as writers, we each must find our own place from which to write. Some may be called to address the issues of the day. And are good at it. God bless those who wrestle those issues and try to make sense of them for the rest of us. We need people in that arena. But I am not one of them.

When I started the blog in 2008, I knew its theme and focus would be about encouraging readers to find ways to live life more beautifully. Since then, our world has changed a lot. Because of social media, we now have the world's woes at our fingertips (and I daily wrestle with the desire to be well informed which is at odds with my desire to remain sane). 

I have asked myself on various occasions, do I need to change the way I write? Should my writing reflect more of the societal and cultural concerns many of us share; should I write to address these troubling issues?

A few years ago I received a comment from a quiet reader of my blog posts. She wrote to me saying, "Since deleting my own blog last year and trying to spend less time online, I haven't been by as much as I have in the past, but today, I was just longing for a glimpse of a beautiful blog, and yours immediately came to mind. … Truly, your little home on the internet adds beauty and joy to my days." 

That, my friends, puts the thumb on the pulse of my reason for keeping this place set apart for beautiful, hopeful things. Sometimes we just need a space where we can 'get away', where we can feel normal for a few minutes. And where we can focus on something that buoys the spirits so that, heartened, we can return to the fray and carry on, at least for the moment.

"Because even with the dark parts and the light parts and the good parts and the bad parts, dinner must still be served." from Once Upon A Wardrobe, p. 102

Four. Recently enjoyed

Babette's Feast (1958)

by Karen Blixen

(This exquisitely written novella is set in a remote village

in Norway during the late 19th century where two pious,

elderly sisters live their quiet lives. When a stranger

shows up on their doorstep one stormy night.)

The Queens of Crime (2025)

by Marie Benedict

(Dorothy L. Sayers, Agatha Christie, and three other

Golden Age crime novelists join forces to solve a 'real' murder)

The Bookseller's Secret (2007)

by Michelle Gable

(a thrilling novel about the English novelist

Nancy Mitford during WWII)

The Other Windsor Girl,

A Novel of Princess Margaret (2019)

by Georgie Blalock

(a fictional peek into Princess Margaret's young life

through the eyes of her lady-in-waiting)

The Maid (mystery, 2022)

by Nita Prose

(Molly the maid loves her job. And  I loved the relationship

she had with her Gran who raised her. A story with mystery,

humour, an upscale hotel, and a body in a bedroom... all

interspersed with bonus quotes from Molly's wise Gran.)

*

Four quiet nonfiction books I'm also spending time with:

For Such A Time As This (2025)

An Emergency Devotional

by Hanna Reichel

Reclaiming Quiet (2024)

Cultivating a Life of Holy Attention

by Sarah Clarkson

Journeys to the Nearby (2025)

A gardener discovers the gentle art of untravelling

by elspeth bradbury

A Thousand Feasts (2024)

Small moments of joy, a memoir of sorts

by Nigel Slater

Five. My 5-year commonplace diary  

I began this pint-size five-year commonplace diary in January 2022. The idea was inspired by author Austin Kleon who used this diary to jot a favourite line he came across each day. Last month on January 1st, I started the fifth year. By the time I write my last quote on December 31st, I will have curated 1825 quotations—how is that for one tiny diary. Something I noticed as I watched the pages fill with quotes over the weeks, months, and now years, I am amazed at how often I recognize my frame of mind and what might have been going on, either in my life or the world at large, by the quotes I was drawn to at the time. Here's a handful to close out today's post:

*

February 2, 2022

"You're the right woman to handle your life."

Sally Clarkson

*

February 3, 2023

"Your work matters. God

intended you to make a difference."

Sandi Somers, "Building a Body of Work", InScribe blog post

*

February 4, 2024

"Always have something to look forward to."

Unknown

*

February 5, 2025

"Even in the darkness we will trust : that

our lives are still in your hands."

Shayne Claiborne, Common Prayer, p. 243

*

February 6, 2026

"Count your many blessings,

name them one by one."

line from the hymn 'Count Your Blessings' 

❦

Dear beautiful friends, thank you for visiting.

I am so grateful for your presence here. 

Wishing you a beautiful day,

Brenda

Photo credits:

(Top)Image by pezibear from Pixabay

(Hyacinth)Image by patrizzia from Pixabay

(Rest of pics)Brenda Leyland @ It's A Beautiful Life

 

My Blogging Schedule:

I post on Fridays